This is a really random post about what I think of my relationship with my sister. I usually end up writing about something I've been thinking off alot lately. Maybe the whole day. And the thought of my sister going back to college in another city has been haunting me for a while now.
I had an off today and my sister had to go for work. Unfortunately, her internship doesn't allow her too many offs. So I had to spend the whole day alone at home. Although my mom was around, we usually sit in different rooms, she's usually on the phone, watching tv, doing things around the house etc and I'm just usually online. The entire day. That's how our routine was even when I didn't have a job. But nowadays, I seem to miss my sister too much when she's not around. She's a sister, best friend and a boy friend to me.
We all take our siblings for granted sometime or the other. We all have that phase in life when we have physical fights. Then we move onto a phase when we have verbal (abusive) fights. And then, when we finally start getting along and understanding each other, it's time to move away. That's what happened with my sister and me. I didn't even realise how much my younger sister grew up while I was away in Pune. The sort of phase she went through, which I wanted to protect her from. And then, when I finally moved back home, it was time for her to leave.
My sister and I have shared a great relationship throughout our lives. I loved her from even before she was born. Apparently I went around telling the whole world that if my mummy got me a baby brother, I'd leave him right there, in the hospital itself. Or maybe in Delhi (since we were moving to Hyderabad). I was definite about wanting a baby sister. I must've been quite something even at the age of 3 to threaten my mom. I've been a pretty good older sister to her I think. Yes we used to fight alot as well...but isn't that a phase all of us go through?
What I am proud of, is the relationship we share now. I never really thought we'd reach a point where I'd take her to a shisha place, let her try it for the first time, leave her with my good friends who'd give her vodka shots, and then eventually stand on our balcony with her and share a smoke. Ok maybe I didn't think that day would come so soon. Yet I feel so comfortable with where we are today. For the last year and a half, since she moved away to go to college, she has understood me better than anyone in the world. She finally understood what living away from home was like. She finally understood what sort of stuff is to be told to parents and what's not. She finally understood what living on a budget was like. She also understood why I love my friends so so much. Why they were my life in Pune, and those are bonds I will keep for life. She learnt enough from my experiences to make decisions for herself. I'm not saying necessarily the right decisions. But they are her decisions. She stopped judging me and I never judged her cause I did most of those things myself. As a 19 year old, she helped me through my first break up, giving me advice, abusing my ex, everything it took to see me happier. After 6 months of not smoking, she got me my first cigarette and said here, if this makes you feel any better. She talked to me when I was really depressed, she fought with my mom for me, telling her to back off and not say anything to me, she was a great listener, a good friend, and that one person I really needed to talk to at the end of the day during that horrible phase.
Today, if I am alive, it's for her. I'm not completely over my tough phase yet. But then again, life is never easy. But if I want to do well, it's for her. I want to be able to guide her, be that older sister she can look upto. We still have our deep conversations pretty often, and talking to her always makes me feel better. She's the one person in my family I can cry to (however awkward that makes her).
Today, I bought her a present from my first salary. The joy I felt after that was something I'd never felt before, and it's also something I'd like to feel more often. I want the best for her, in life, and I want to do my best in giving her whatever she wants.
She's going back to college in a month, and will be away for a while. Till now I thought life in Gurgaon was depressing, cause I didn't have a social life here. But what I'm dreading more is that after this month, I won't have my best friend here either. I'll have absolutely no one. I won't have anyone to text to all day, I won't have anyone to pick up after work, I won't have someone to shout at for my room being a mess. I won't have someone to talk to about my day and share a smoke with. I'll miss her more than she will know.
I had an off today and my sister had to go for work. Unfortunately, her internship doesn't allow her too many offs. So I had to spend the whole day alone at home. Although my mom was around, we usually sit in different rooms, she's usually on the phone, watching tv, doing things around the house etc and I'm just usually online. The entire day. That's how our routine was even when I didn't have a job. But nowadays, I seem to miss my sister too much when she's not around. She's a sister, best friend and a boy friend to me.
We all take our siblings for granted sometime or the other. We all have that phase in life when we have physical fights. Then we move onto a phase when we have verbal (abusive) fights. And then, when we finally start getting along and understanding each other, it's time to move away. That's what happened with my sister and me. I didn't even realise how much my younger sister grew up while I was away in Pune. The sort of phase she went through, which I wanted to protect her from. And then, when I finally moved back home, it was time for her to leave.
My sister and I have shared a great relationship throughout our lives. I loved her from even before she was born. Apparently I went around telling the whole world that if my mummy got me a baby brother, I'd leave him right there, in the hospital itself. Or maybe in Delhi (since we were moving to Hyderabad). I was definite about wanting a baby sister. I must've been quite something even at the age of 3 to threaten my mom. I've been a pretty good older sister to her I think. Yes we used to fight alot as well...but isn't that a phase all of us go through?
What I am proud of, is the relationship we share now. I never really thought we'd reach a point where I'd take her to a shisha place, let her try it for the first time, leave her with my good friends who'd give her vodka shots, and then eventually stand on our balcony with her and share a smoke. Ok maybe I didn't think that day would come so soon. Yet I feel so comfortable with where we are today. For the last year and a half, since she moved away to go to college, she has understood me better than anyone in the world. She finally understood what living away from home was like. She finally understood what sort of stuff is to be told to parents and what's not. She finally understood what living on a budget was like. She also understood why I love my friends so so much. Why they were my life in Pune, and those are bonds I will keep for life. She learnt enough from my experiences to make decisions for herself. I'm not saying necessarily the right decisions. But they are her decisions. She stopped judging me and I never judged her cause I did most of those things myself. As a 19 year old, she helped me through my first break up, giving me advice, abusing my ex, everything it took to see me happier. After 6 months of not smoking, she got me my first cigarette and said here, if this makes you feel any better. She talked to me when I was really depressed, she fought with my mom for me, telling her to back off and not say anything to me, she was a great listener, a good friend, and that one person I really needed to talk to at the end of the day during that horrible phase.
Today, if I am alive, it's for her. I'm not completely over my tough phase yet. But then again, life is never easy. But if I want to do well, it's for her. I want to be able to guide her, be that older sister she can look upto. We still have our deep conversations pretty often, and talking to her always makes me feel better. She's the one person in my family I can cry to (however awkward that makes her).
Today, I bought her a present from my first salary. The joy I felt after that was something I'd never felt before, and it's also something I'd like to feel more often. I want the best for her, in life, and I want to do my best in giving her whatever she wants.
She's going back to college in a month, and will be away for a while. Till now I thought life in Gurgaon was depressing, cause I didn't have a social life here. But what I'm dreading more is that after this month, I won't have my best friend here either. I'll have absolutely no one. I won't have anyone to text to all day, I won't have anyone to pick up after work, I won't have someone to shout at for my room being a mess. I won't have someone to talk to about my day and share a smoke with. I'll miss her more than she will know.
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